Ah, Lana Del Rey. Possibly the finest example of both how quickly the collective Internet can get behind something, as well as how quickly it can spit on it and throw it down the trash chute. In Lana Del Rey’s case, she was both examples. Months ago, when “Video Games” hit the web, blogs everywhere, including ours, threw their arms up in jubilation as the Internet announced the coming of an indie goddess. The flowers in her hair. The lips. She looked like Indie Barbie, complete with clip-on microphone and a unique voice.

Then came “Blue Jeans” and “Born to Die,” more examples of solid songs from Miss LDR, formerly known as failed singer Lizzy Grant. And the Internet came back stronger. She booked SNL. She had crazy buzz. The Internet was hers for the taking. And then what happened?

She sang on SNL like a drunk girl at karaoke who so desperately wanted to prove she could “actually sing.” It was awkward. It was off-pitch. It was terrible.

Then, her album drops, and the Internet reared its ugly head and kicked her to the curb. Pretty universally panned, it’s like an album that, save for the few (still legitimately good) singles, feels like it wasn’t even written for her. Her voice is awkward. They songs sound the same. It’s blah. It’s whatever. It’s nothing special.

I won’t renounce liking the former three singles, but until she really finds her voice and identity, Lizzy/Lana is two strikes down.

5 Word Review of Lana Del Rey’s Born to Die:

Just as disappointing as SNL.